I don’t make resolutions. i don’t sit with a paper in front of me and write a few things about my life that I think will change when the clock strikes 12 but blessed are they who do. i instead believe the beginning of my year is on my birthday, and therefore on my birthday I draft a list of things I want achieved by the end of the year in discussion the stash the list away and on my next birthday I remove the list see what was achieved and what wasn’t…most of the time, never works. so this year I didn’t make a list instead i decide to do resolutions….the change that I am, so lets see how it all goes.
1. A NICER ME
If I had a dollar for everytime I used that phrase I would be rich. okay lets make this clear this doesn’t mean in any way that I am mean, it just means I don’t handle my negatives as well as people would love me to. I am a listener but I am a choosy listener. I don’t like people who complain over things they have control over, I say its your life do the best that works for you. If you force me to sit down and listen to you whine about how you like this guy who never calls you flirts with other girls doesn’t pick your calls up etc and you still think he is the one I will force my brain to play dead or just tell you to your face that I don’t want to hear it hence earning the title mean. I have decided to change that and actually I will listen to the serious and non serious problem although I don’t promise to be of much help.
2. APOLOGIES AND WRONGS
So it takes a minute to annoy me, when its petty I let it go when its big though I can talk to you but I promise it will be quite a bad conversation until you do something about it, when you are wrong that is, I cant pretend, I hold grudges like you wouldn’t wish and I will never stop reminding you of it. so this year I will let much go, wrongs and all. When you wrong me, apologize. i am quite keen, I am particularly keen on how long this apology will take. I admit when am wrong and it shouldn’t take me more than a sober day to say so to you. so when it takes you more than that, are you really sorry or you just feel like this is fight you cant win and you say it for the sake of it? I am keen and therefore half the time I make assumptions regarding peoples intentions and you don’t want me to make one over an apology like I said…I hold grudges, just ask the boy in primary school who made fun of my walking style,. so if we argue I will drive to you, ow walk, or you will do either and we will eat cake and we will laugh about it but after a day has passed lets not bother cause lets face it you really weren’t sorry….what was this resolution again?????
3. MY EMOTIONS
“When you love until it hurts, there can be no more hurting, just more love” -Mother Teressa
I love this quote why, I use it anytime people tell me am heartless or I don’t care when they fail to notice that I actually always wear my emotions on my sleeves…Mexican style, dear Alejandro. I think the world is full of pretenders, those boys who walk around calling themselves bad boys and players, blessed be all of you as well as all the girls who say men are trash and dogs, again Amen to them and their beliefs. I think half of the people in the world have such control issues and are in pursuit of maintaining control that they let the good things pass them by. I mean lets be honest if a fairy tale is good and it has an ending right…. so what gives you the right to think good things shouldn’t end and when they do you walk around the world whining about how you were lied to and felt cheated and how love is a lie, personally instead of listening to you I would ether stare up the ceiling taking breathing exercises. on the other hand I just live life quite aloof especially when a certain reaction is expected of me. for instance the other day a friend who once upon a time liked me comes to me to say he has fallen for my sister alot of other stories followed it but at the end of the day I told him i would totally support him if he went for her. he was shocked apparently the world requires me to be mad over that, hah-aha, I root for love why should I be mad again? Anyway I promise to say what I am thinking about every situation, I promise to say how I feel about people and things I think that’s how the world should be…….
I feel like I wont stop writing so lets pick this up sometime else….BLESSED 2013 to all of you!!!!