A friend posted this on my wall. Well, I appreciate any slight read I can make so I did take my time, I read this and……wow! I agreed with a few things, I laughed at some, I rolled eyes at some. Then it hit me, a few posts I did sometime ago touched on this modernized women, and one of my ardent readers told me I should have looked at both angles, I agreed, I should have, I would have, but word count issues and topical direction matter. Ummmmh well I read this article and I finally got the “mojo” to bang a few words about this, offer my fifty cents of opinion on it.
HAHA!!!!! Wait, not on every store but say every street you are on, then with your audacity you tell me “Why Kenyan Ladies born in the 80′s & 90′s will probably never get married”. If this is what i have on the menu, then no thank you, I DO NOT want to even consider this marriage angle.
Okay, let’s make it clear, I will not want to pick a fight over here. I believe everyone has a genuine right to express opinions and all. So, here is my opinion. When I was growing up all I heard was “The Girl Child”. It was all fights towards the girl child education, equality for this girl, let her get equal job opportunities as the guys, let her not get mutilated, it was all her her it is like the only gender that was trending was female species. I benefited from this awareness. I went to a good school, and I hope at the end of it I will get something good to show out of it. Though to be honest, my dad is blessed with lots of females and only a male (oh wait…in totality can be 2 and the other you do not know about, men….you never know) so I don’t really think he had a choice.
What am I trying to say, that somehow, someone forgot to look after the ones who are supposed to be the head. Someone forgot or maybe just assumed that since leadership is encoded in their DNA that it will just come out in them, but it didn’t. Instead what did we end up with, lazy, irresponsible, unaccountable grande….men! Wait and more of this…..
If it is media influence is it only ladies that do want to sport the latest trends?PRIIIIIIIIISSSS!!! I know men who have more trend knowledge than even I do and keep in mind my fashion trend knowledge is quite on a high. So sometime in December, mingle was holding a 3 day camp thing. So am with this pal and we are the discussing the aspects of going. In the midst of the talking he says something how he cannot believe he won’t be going yet it’s when all the fashionistas want to show case their latest wear. Talks about this duffle bag he just got and some very good pushers he would have won. I remember this used to particularly be a girl sort of talk. Where shopping used to be particularly a therapeutic thing for women who are mending broken wounds….I shop whenever in my defense. I do not mean to say that men should not wear clothes. In fact I am particularly picky on the men I choose to date, and the number one thing is his dress code. Wear jeans or khaki, let it be fitting. There is a very thick line between fitting and skinny. Your hair, let is be neat! But when you want to dress like you have just been pulled out of a “One-Direction, Sauti sol” music video, with beats dangling from your neck and a snap back on your head, I will not even turn my head.
When they empowered girl child they failed to tell those boys that responsibility is a thing they should have worn on their sleeves like their big egos! That a parents greatest joy is seeing their children graduate and getting married. That when you decide to be the so called bad boy in your crew then you end up being the 40 year old guy in a pub hooking up with a campus diva looking for 1k to fix her hair or at least get her tickets to mingle or at least dine at 680 for a night and tell her friends about it. That when labels belong on jars not on women, and there is no such thing as a “lying whore”. A woman will treat you good if you are true to her, and that if men decided to stop the mind games then there is no way that girl will cheat on you. Somebody forgot to tell these boys, (I say boys and not men today) that getting in a relationship or getting married is the sign of responsibility and not being soft!
Well men like it all easy these days. They stopped the courting because anyway women put it out too easily. I have my reservations about virginity and all. I often would judge, and keep in mind harshly, women who would sleep with every Tom, Dick…..and Dick (notice the pun) hehe. I do not anymore, ideologies make us, women our harshest critics. If you want to explore your sexuality well please do. That if you do not and are branded uptight, well do not feel bad either, as long as it was your decision. If at some point this guy comes along and he feels like you are the one (a chuckle) he will stay even without the sex (more chuckle). I do not mean it to be sarcastic, I however know how men think and in their minds, sex makes their world go round. What am trying to put across, is someone failed to tell the men to practice what they preach. That when they say women drink too much and then refuse to go out with that plane Jane at home cause she is boring then its a conflict of opinions. Make up your mind for once, we hate the games.
The article above mentioned how women won’t get married because we have to bring value to the man’s life. So, listen to him, offer opinions with regards to his new business plans etc. I have this personal motto. I can not date a guy who cannot be my friend. That I can talk to him about anything stupid hilarious. When a girl comes to talk to you, she isn’t looking for you to fix her, she especially isn’t trying to help you make a decision. She actually just wants you to listen. Someone actually forgot to tell these boys that listening is an art. That when you cringe when I am trying to tell you something, in the name that I am making a speech then you really do help my decisions to be easy. So why would you want her to listen when you can not listen to her? So, story time. Once I ever heard this parting speech “I know most guys would dream to date a girl who can play PS, discuss football, play pool, kick it back and just chill. What I want is someone who can just sit down and listen”. Funny, a few conversations back there was a mention of something he loved about someone else and it went like “She is so down to earth, can just come over and play PS with me……blah blah blah”. Recall I said define a clear line! yeah!
When our elders clearly forgot to outline a few things here and there, these boys lost direction. Such that when they get a call from the girls with something like, hi…i think am late, they switch their phones off and say something like “How sure is she that it is mine”. What we were left with is men who when asked to do a simple thing like cut down on your drinking that tummy is getting to be a bit much, you hear that women are nagging and want firemen for hubby’s. We get men who claim that they only like dating older women because they are sooooo understanding, full of vision and they help you out with your dreams….so polite, they do not nag much….what they fail to add is….older women with much money that I do not have to work a single day in life, except on her bed of course. What we ended up with was men who refuse to move out of their mothers house, because she is a better cook and we apparently hate chores. Funny story is you want me to come cook for you at your mums house or my dads house.
We got boys who say marriage is a waste of money and resources. That is it not enough that you know am in love with you? Keep in mind you are taking me out of my parent’s house. They raised me all those years, they took me to school, they clothed me and took me to the hospital. They could do a cost analysis for all that and trust me it will not amount to that so called amount you apparently say is too much to have that wedding ceremony. So I guess it goes without saying that it brought up boys who cannot appreciate the value of what they are getting!
Men whose only concern is JayZ’S bank statement. Man Utd’s latest score. BMW’s latest release, its speeds, specs, but a simple things as a dinner date is unheard of. Why? when you can have this chique lucid with a couple of shots of kibao?
I could go on forever, I really could but I have to stop. I think I am making it my life mission to come up with a foundation pro-theBoyChild.